In earlier posts I may have given the impression that the Ulster Scots heritage is something less than an integral part of of European high culture (viz Ulster Scots – even more reactionary than I thought and Wee dafties -the Ulster Scots industry.)

In the light of new evidence it’s only right that I revise my earlier mistaken view which was that: “It’s a “culture” without art, literature or music. Hearing it spoken is like listening to a Glasweigian impersonating a Belfast person with a speech defect. Those who have seen its “cultural” events say that it is Scottish music and Scottish dancing performed in the north of Ireland.” This is a wrong, disrespectful and maybe even racialistic way of thinking. Why it’s now even a school subject like Maths, Science and History.weans

Defenders of threatened cultures everywhere owe a huge debt to Professor Billy McWilliams, Teachin’ Fella at the Ulster Scots School o’ Dancin’, Ballymena and the folk (a fine Ulster Scots word pronounced to rhyme with “volk” in Ballymoney) behind the recently launched website 1690 AN’ ALL THON which is using modern technology to prove to a hostile world that Ulster Scots is a heritage with a future. Since it’s Christmas the Professor has rendered the The Gratest Tale Iver Telt into the language of his faithers.

Chaipter Yin

1. Now it came til pass that a wee cuddy named Mary foun’ hersel’ grate wi’ a bairn and she didnae know how it came aboot. She was wile wurried aboot it, fur she was a vurgin aboot tae be married til a woodwurker by the name o’ Joe.

2. Lo, the Angle o’ the Laird came doon and spake til Mary. “Mary”, he said til her,”Dinnae be feart, fur ye are blest amongst weemen. Yer hivin a wain, but its the Laird’s. Awl folk will think yer grate but yil hiv tae call him Jaysus.”

Read on.

Go raibh maith agat RO'B

8 responses to “Ulster Scots – an apology”

  1. Liam, I notice references to a “Laird” in the quoted Ulster-Scots Prayer – might this be a reference to to a security-conscious kilt-wearer who requires expensive security measures before travelling from Belfast to Dublin in a taxi?

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Laird,_Baron_Laird

    When the Good Lord Laird supports the Belfast Agreement, is that not enough reason for carping critics to keep their counsel?

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  2. 1690 AN’ ALL THON: This is a joke, correct?

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  3. Mr Radical – many adherents of the Papist / Marxist / Jewish / Freemason conspiracy to deny the validity of the Ulster Scots heritage resort to cheap ridicule when they discuss it.

    These people take it seriously and some of them don’t even get a government grant for their work:

    http://www.ulsterscotsagency.com/

    http://www.electricscotland.com/history/ulster_scots/

    http://www.theulsterscots.com/

    http://www.ulster-scots.co.uk/

    And I’m sure Professor Billy McWilliams does too.

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  4. Liam,
    Well, I guess the joke was on me. My favorite tag line is “.. to promote the Scots-Irish/ Ulster-Scots heritage overseas, particularly among Scotch-Irish Americans, many of whom wrongly believe themselves to be Irish American”. All these years of plastic shillelaghs and green beer when we should have been reading Robert Burns and thumping the Romans. Think of all of the little boys that might not have been fondled had they known they were inthe wrong church. Lot’s of folks over here are going to want there money back.

    Do they have a one drop rule? One drop of Ulster-Scots and you are, or one drop of something else and you aren’t. I’d ask them, but I’m afraid of the answer. Is there actually an Ulster-Scots language (calling peoples Taigs doesn’t count, that’s clearly Irish)? If they’re Scots nationalists how do they feel about The Act of Union. So many questions….these folks just confuse me.

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  5. Rustbelt – if there is a language it’s not one you ever hear anyone speaking and if you tried using it in any Belfast shop not selling UDA souvenirs they’d assume you were a tourist who didn’t speak English. There are dialect words like “thon”, “fernenst”, “quare”, “scundered” which are occasionally used especially by older people. If you search this site for the video of my uncle Charly you can hear a bit of it.

    It is most definitely not a language. It is the loyalist gangster gangs’ attempt to get a bit of grant funding from the Brits in much the same way that the Provies are trying to make a revolution through British government funding of Irish language programmes.

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  6. Thanks Liam,

    I just wasted about two hours looking through these sites. I’m still perplexed, but confused “ideologies” are confusing. I’m guessing they use the term “Ulster-Scots” so the word Irish as in “Scots-Irish” does not appear. As you know Ulster actually has no relation at all to the island of Ireland, it was only the shifts in the tectonic plates that forced them together.

    I see that one of the sites lists Confederate General “Stonewall” Jackson (they are selling a pin of the Confederate battle flag with the Red Hand of Ulster flag) as a leading “Ulster-Scots American” (not Grant or Sheridan both with family from Tyrone?). Jackson was just about the most batshit whack job in an army full of batshit whack jobs. But the right loves him to this day. “Gallantry” and all that. Jackson would have fit in well with the Free Presbyterians. God did not, fortunately, protect him from being killed by his own troops (an accident). Oy vey.

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  7. splinteredsunrise Avatar
    splinteredsunrise

    Jaipers!

    What took me to the fair was the education report where “children with special needs” translated to “wee daftie bairns”. Not easy to be politically correct in Ulster Scots, is it?

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  8. Liam MacUaid’s unlikely ally Newton Emerson :

    http://www.irishnews.com/articles/540/606/2009/1/8/607015_368467209226UlsterSco.html

    – who else can summon up courage to call for closure of the Ulster-Scots Agency?

    Strange Bedfellows?

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